Motherhood is beautiful, messy and hard. It brings delight to you on some days, and it drains you on other days.
That is how it is, and it is okay.
How does a good Mum look like to you? Do you have a picture of her in your mind yet? Does she have a perfectly ironed apron on, while serving freshly baked chocolate chip cookies with a warm, loving smile? Does she have all her children sitting quietly in a row, patiently waiting for their turn to play, while she sings and does the laundry?
How does a good Mum really look like to you?
There is a reality that happens in our day to day lives, and there is also a “reality” that we constantly tell ourselves. What have you been telling yourself today, Mama? Is that really the truth? Is that what God says about you?
Motherhood is hard.
I don’t know how you feel about it, but it is no easy task for me. It takes a lot of patience, wisdom, and self-control. Sometimes, at the end of each day, I feel uncertain if I did the right things.
Can you relate?
As if our day to day activities are not enough, we sometimes push ourselves to battle doubts like, “Did I do that right? Could I have done that better? Did she have too much screen time? Maybe if I sent her for tuition, she would have fared better for her exams? Is it too late? Have I unknowingly messed up my kid? Am I a bad Mum?”
Motherhood is beautiful, but it is also so hard.
We hold ourselves to an expectation that seems impossible to surmount. A mountain of expectations of what a good Mum should look like, and how we are so far from it.
Mums, let me whisper these truths to you, that I so desperately need for myself too:
2 Corinthians 12:9
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. (NIV)”
“Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. (NIV)”
“but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (NIV)”
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (NIV)”
1 Peter 5:7
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (NIV)”
God looks at you with love and compassion, and He says His grace is more than sufficient for every need that we have – even in our tendency to find security in how we are doing as Mums, through the performance of our children.
Did you get that?
Let me repeat.
He says His grace is more than sufficient for every need that we have – even in our tendency to find security in how we are doing as Mums, through the performance of our children.
Don’t we do that?
Don’t we rate ourselves on a scale based on how well our child behaves for that day? Then find pleasure based on whether our child listens to our instructions, or not at all? Don’t we get frustrated at ourselves for not getting this motherhood thing right, especially when we see our child crying again and again for reasons that are beyond us?
See, that’s the thing. Our security was never meant to be placed in these things.
Motherhood can sometimes feel scary. You are given charge of a precious soul, and the well-being of that baby depends so much on you. It is a huge responsibility that you never ever feel fully equipped for.
Those two beautiful words are to be on our lips every single day, Mama.
You feel you are messing up. But God says His grace is more than sufficient for you.
You feel like you could have done better today. But God says His grace is more than sufficient for you.
You feel worried about your child’s learning abilities and are stressed that it is too late to make changes. But God says His grace is more than sufficient for you.
But God. Two simple words that can completely change our focus.
Let us look to our Savior for the security that we need. Let us remember that our children are sinful, just like we are, and they are daily in need of a Savior too.
When you start to question yourself if you can do this thing called motherhood, remind yourself of God’s truths and start relying on his strength, not yours.
We will never be perfect. But if God is in our lives, we truly have more than sufficient for our every need.
It means no matter how your child behaves today, it is not going to change the truth that you, dear mama, are a beloved child of God. Let the love of God wash over your anxious heart tonight and allow His peace to seep into every train of thought.
How does a good Mum really look like?
Possibly quite different from what you would expect.
Possibly, she whispers, “But God. But God…” 🙂
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